I have good news and bad news.  The bad news is that, right now, there isn’t any news.  Except of course for the news about there being no news, plus the aforementioned good news, of which I am about to to tell you.  The good news is that there will soon be some news, because Gamescom is this week, which was actually news to me, since I had completely forgotten about this event.  This latter factoid, if you didn’t already know it, might also be classified as news and means I must therefore amend my previous statement regarding there only being two bits of news and oh no I’ve gone cross-eyed.

Gamescom.  I always thought it should be called GamesCON, because of it being a convention of sorts, but that’s neither here nor there.  The important bit is that it’s happening this week, from the 13th to the 17th of August.  But this article goes out on the 12th, meaning that it’s the proverbial calm before the storm.  None of the juicy news has happened yet.  All we’ve got to chew on are some decidedly appetising schedules and perhaps the odd teaser trailer.

But at least we have a good idea of what’s happening.  Gamescom has never been the secrecy-draped affair that E3 is; while there may be a few surprises, what we’re mostly looking forward to is more detail on the surprises we got a few months ago.  We’re probably going to see more Battlefield: Hardline and Dragon Age: Inquisition from EA, along with a healthy dose of The Sims 4.  Assassin’s Creed, The Crew and Tom Clancy’s The Division from Ubisoft are also pretty much guaranteed to be on show.

Nintendo will be making a song and dance of their upcoming titles for both the Wii U and the 3DS, which will be interesting.  2015 might actually be the year when the Wii U becomes a sensible and worthwhile purchase, given that there will be a plethora of decent games coming out.  Rearing its head before the end of Autumn, however, will be Bayonetta 2, Super Smash Brothers and Hyrule Warriors.  While I would definitely be interested in the former and the latter, the one in the middle can take a running jump, which I’m sure is fairly integral to the actual gameplay, so there you have it.

That being said, I’m more interested in their lineup for next year, which includes Captain Toad’s Treasure Tracker and Splatoon, which look unironically awesome and I really hope Nintendo don’t ruin them.  Expect to see more of this Amiibo madness as well.

The Sony repertoire is equally meaty, with big names like Bloodborne, Driveclub and The Order: 1886.  Only one of these is due out this year, mind you, and it has been pushed back quite significantly from its initial status as a promised launch title for the PS4.  There’ll be a ton of indie games under the Sony umbrella, too; not to mention a number of re-releases for their newest console.  The Unfinished Swan and Journey were great games, but I’m not about to pay for them a second time so soon, Mr. Sony.  Best be making them Cross-Buy and giving them to me for free, eh?  There’s a good chap.

There’ll probably be much ado about LittleBigPlanet 3 and more on No Man’s Sky, because people are stupidly crazy about the former and understandably so regarding the latter.  Some select few Vita titles will also be on the cards, which will be nice, since I’d hate for Sony to abandon it entirely to indies.  If I want to play nothing but indie games, I’ve got a PC for that.

As for Microsoft?  Well, my disdain for them should be well-known by now.  Their lineup is rather anemic compared to the other two big-hitters.  Forza Horizon 2, Killer Instinct and Quantum Break.  Now correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t we just have a Forza game?  Oh, this one’s different, right.  I should probably just forget that Killer Instinct has been out for a year, too.  Quantum Break, you say?  I thought that Microsoft cancelled their TV studio?  I’m sure this game will be a massive success anyway, yes sir.  No doubt all three of the consoleers (that’s not a word, but I’m going to use it anyway) will lay claim to a few other titles during the course of the week.  Konami is showing more MGS:V, Square-Enix will have Kingdom Hearts and Theatrhythm, while Sega have the new Alien game and yet another reboot of Sonic to disappoint us with.

But it wouldn’t be a preview without some delicious dates and times to look forward to, would it?  As has become somewhat traditional, the Sony, Microsoft and EA have to get their toes in the door early, so they’re doing their main press conferences the day before the bloody thing starts.  Since it’s a European event, we can rest assured that no-one is going to be able to watch them, regardless of where they are in the Western world, since everyone in the correct time zone is working and everyone in the US is probably asleep.  The sole exception is Sony, who have the good sense to have their conference after I get home from work, so they win bonus points already.

You’ve already missed Microsoft, who were up first today at 13:00 BST (which is British Summer Time).  That’s apparently 08:00 Eastern and 05:00 Pacific in the US, which is just terrible.  If you have any sense, you’re watching Sony’s conference right now, which is scheduled for 18:00 BST / 13:00 Eastern / 10:00 Pacific.  EA is last up on Wednesday at the universally stupid time of 09:00 BST / 04:00 Eastern / 01:00 Pacific.

Anyway, let’s see what happens.  No doubt there’ll be things to talk about on Friday for my next article.

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